I live for days like today. My body was fully rested and hydrated and my five mile run was effortless. It felt as though I were floating, mile after mile and breath after breath. My gait was impeccable, my stride consistent, and my form flawless. These days do not happen often, especially lately with the stress i have been undergoing of moving to a new city and leaving my friends and family. My record of never living in one place for longer than a year has been consistent since i turned 18...and while i absorb the benefits of change, i also look forward to becoming familiar with one town for the next 3 years. And this is why I live for days like today. My friends and family are wonderful and they know me well. When they can see that I am stressed beyond my means, these are always their words: Go for a run Bugs. I follow their orders and suddenly the world is not as dim as it once was.
As with everything in life, I am not immune. The aches and pains I have suffered are unique and distinct to who I am and to the life God intended for me. I have prayed often for God to take away my injuries so that I may run at the level that I used to...Alas, healing will always take time and patience. Instead of taking away my injuries altogether - as though they never existed, He replaces them stronger muscles and tendons that had never had the chance to grow. Injuries are a blessing. They help your realize that you are human, and getting hurt should not be your downfall - even if the pain lasts for years. Injuries may lead you into a new direction, a new passion as mine lead me to triathlon. And they are not the end of you, but the beginning of a stronger more resilient athlete and human being.
As many of you have read, I enjoy pushing myself beyond my limits. My philosophy being that anything a normal person could do, and endurance athlete could do twice as well for twice as long. And thus, I am still somewhat broken. Athletes must find the balance between going hard and going home. Too much hard work and you will break down. Too much easy work and you will go slow. We must use the concept of rest to guide the concept of maximizing hard work. Our bodies replenish energy stores, oxygen carrying red blood cells, and any other metabolic substrate that has been used up during the period of stimulus. During rest our bodies will exceed the normal biological state, and greater stores of energy will be available during the next stimulus (Vigil). In other words, rest makes us stronger. Which works both in life and in running.
So why am I so bad at resting? When I rest I allow all those nagging doubts and fears in my subconscious to rise to the surface. Id rather endure hours upon hours of hill repeats, ice cold 4am mile and a half lake swims, and pushing my body to collapse and making it exhausted than listen to those negative thoughts. I need rest, and yet I fear rest. To know rest is to know quiet. To know quiet is to know a time without self-deception. And to know rest is also to know rejuvenation.
You need to know this about me: Running saved my life. Without running I would be dead somewhere. t kept me sane when I was trying to find my way in life. It gave me a sense of self when the world didn't get me. It gave me peace on days when my mind was chaos. It gave me glory as I crossed my first finish line. It gave me contentment, gave me connection, gave me catharsis.
Strength through rest...what a concept.
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